Good Enough
by Latent Lullaby
Summary: Oneshot based off of the song Good Enough. By Evanescence. Inuyasha thinks and reflects about kagome and his life one day, while waiting for her to return to her house. INUKAG


Good Enough

One-shot/song fic

By Zeldagurl

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha nor Evanescence's great music. Otherwise I'd be in concert, just like her! Probably crooning out love songs or something... (Shudders for her readers sakes)

Authors note: Well, I was listening to my Evanescence cd and trying to think of an idea for a one-shot to take a break from my two big stories. So I started listening to number 13, titled, Good Enough; and I got an idea.

(Begin)

_Caught in your spell again_

_I can't say no to you_

It was a sunny day as always in modern day Japan; and Inuyasha lay quietly on his back on the roof of Kagome's house. He stared up at the sky with a thoughtful look on his face.

He was waiting for Kagome to come home from school; he'd been there since the early morning, watching the sky and thinking to himself. It wasn't very often that he had time to himself to just think... He was always too busy fighting, or running away to think of thinking.

Kagome had begged him early in the morning to go to school; giving him the puppy face and turning those big eyes against him. He'd have to say that it only took about five minutes before he caved in beneath that face. How could he say no to her, when she looked just like that...?

_Crave my heart and it's bleeding in your hands_

_I can't say no to you_

He didn't know why he couldn't just put his foot down and keep her with him always. That was what he wanted, wasn't it? It would be so easy to seal off the well and to stay with her...

Inuyasha thought about it for a moment more before turning onto his side to face the well. He eyed it with a lazy glare; it held the power to take her away from him, but then it also held the power to keep her at his side.

He could never do that to her though... Even if it would be easy, in a physical way anyway. It would make her unhappy; and that would be the last thing he would ever consent to cause. Kagome was more important than anything; even the breath he drew in his lungs at that very moment. To him, she was essential to living; someone that he knew he couldn't live without.

While he escorted her to and from the present; he just couldn't seem to keep a grip on himself when she was away from him. He couldn't get enough of her...

He needed her to the point that he would rip his own bleeding heart out of his body; if it would keep her alive, safe and happy. He just hoped that he would never have to... It would hurt a hell of a lot more than being run through with a sword or something, that was for sure.

But still, he knew he would do it without a moments thought or hesitation if her life was on the line.

_Shouldn't have let you torture me so sweetly_

_Now I can't let go of this dream_

_I can't breathe_

_But I feel..._

He had realized these things long ago; soon after Miroku had joined their merry little group. Maybe it was because, at the time, he had felt that Miroku was competition. He realized that she was precious to him as soon as another male got close to her; a feeling that wasn't limited to Miroku or Kouga or that Hobo boy that Kagome had talked about a while back.

He couldn't pinpoint it though, the exact moment when he had fallen in love with her. It kind of just snuck up on him; shocking him when he realized that he couldn't function without this woman around.

It had seemed like torture at first; being around her. First of all, because she looked just like Kikyo, and was like his first love in some ways. He hadn't wanted to be near her, because it reminded him that Kikyo had betrayed him, and that he would always be alone...

Second of all, she was hard to deal with; sitting him at the strangest times and then trying to get him to talk about his feelings. He had opted to ignore her, and to avoid fighting with her when he could. But somehow, all of her touchy-feely words had gotten through to him, and he had started to want her around.

Not because she understood him; because she still didn't completely know everything about him. But because she tried to understand him. No one but Kikyo and his mother had ever tried to do that; he had missed having someone like that around.

Inuyasha sat up and looked in the direction of the stairway, watching to see if she was anywhere near being back yet. He couldn't see her...

He cursed to himself.

Of course, he had physical reactions to her too.

She was a beautiful girl, with full pink lips and big brown eyes that made him stop in his tracks every time. Whenever he looked at her, he felt that he couldn't breathe properly, and he wasn't standing up as straight as he could because his knees always tried to buckle beneath him. The scent of her made his heart stop, made him stop... It made him want to bask in its rich musky smell, to let it cover him so that he could take it wherever he wanted to.

She always had beautiful silky hair; so smooth and inviting that he had actually once found himself wanting to drag his hands through it; just to feel it...

Even he had to admit that some of these things were a bit, what did Miroku call it? Corny, sappy and sad? Maybe not that extremely put, but he still laughed at himself (inwardly) sometimes for some of the things he thought about in his mind.

_I feel..._

He closed his eyes and lay back on the roof, putting his hands beneath his head and stretching out.

_I feel..._

Kagome just made him feel good.

He felt in a better mood when he was around her, and he felt a lot more worth her time.

It was kind of funny, how his whole body and mind seemed to react positively to her (except for that damned sit spell), how she made him feel completely different.

When he was with her, it didn't matter whether the townspeople whispered about him or the demons called him a half breed. It didn't matter at all, because she didn't care. Because she accepted him as he was, it made him think that maybe, everyone was wrong. It made him think that everyone who had ever hated him or teased him or called him names had gotten it wrong. Because he was a person too, and he deserved to be treated like one.

She gave him courage to feel good enough to live, to be happy, and to be with her...

_Good Enough_

_I feel good enough_

_For you_

She always told him that she liked him as a hanyou, a half-demon. And he guessed that after all of the times she had told him that he wasn't what everyone called him; it kind of sunk in.

That was a big difference between her and Kikyo. Kagome accepted him, and Kikyo had not. Kikyo had wanted him to become human so that both of them could live a normal life together. She hadn't been willing to give everything just to be with him.

Kagome gave him the choice to be whatever he wanted to be. She gave him the freedom and support that Kikyo hadn't known to give. And she still promised to stay by his side, even through everything...

He was so lucky.

_Drink up sweet decadence_

_I can't say no to you_

_And I've completely lost myself _

_And I don't mind_

_I can't say no to you_

Inuyasha had never known, in his world, that the kind of love he had for Kagome had even existed.

Not that he understood love at all; like most men, Inuyasha didn't spend time trying to articulate love as best he could, even though he could do a pretty good job in his thoughts.

It was just that, his love for her was so strong. He couldn't imagine hating her, or even disliking her. They had already been through the toughest of the tough; arguments, near death experiences, jealousy, hurt...

Even through all of the shit that they had been forced through, they still stuck by each other.

And between everything happening to them, he still found the time to lose himself in her eyes. He still lost control once in a while, and let his tough mask slip. He let go sometimes around her, and he always found that he didn't mind...

How could he?

_Shouldn't have let you conquer me completely_

_Now I can't let go of this dream_

He wished that she understood why he didn't want her to leave him alone. He wished she knew that she affected him this way. Things would be so much easier between them.

It was just that, now that he had her, he couldn't let go of her. He probably should have let her know before hand that he was a little on the possessive side (Just a little). He smiled softly to himself.

_Can't believe that I feel_

_Good Enough_

_I feel good enough_

_It's been such a long time coming, but I feel good_

If he had known that he would feel this good about himself when he was just a pup, he might have not minded, even back then, when the other kids pulled on his ears or tripped him and called him mean things.

He might not have believed them for the longest time, and he might not have let them rule his life in the way that they always used to. He might not have really cared at all...

Even now, he couldn't believe, after being called worthless and a monster between his two peoples, that he was actually a person...

He couldn't believe that after all of this time, that he was someone after all.

_And I'm still waiting for the rain to fall_

_Pour real life down on me_

But then, life was never perfect.

Inuyasha knew that something was going to have to happen between him and Kagome before the end of the quest. Kikyo still needed him to go with her to hell, and he still needed to kill Naraku for everyone's sake. He was constantly waiting for the day that the dream would end, and he would have to make a choice between Kikyo and Kagome.

He wanted to be with Kagome, but then he had an obligation to Kikyo.

These two things had been playing a tugging game with him the moment he realized that he loved Kagome. He didn't want to make either of them pay for his mistakes, and he didn't want to be without Kagome.

He was going to have to tell her how he felt, at the very least. He was so scared that she would push him away, just because it was all anyone else had ever done. But something gave him the feeling that he was just being stupid... He couldn't pretend to know what was going on in Kagome's head. And until she knew about his feelings for her, she wouldn't have to say anything.

He knew she at least cared about him... For him, that was enough.

_Cause I can't hold on to anything_

_This good_

_Enough_

_Am I good enough?_

_For you to love me too?_

Even though she told him that he was worth it, was he worth it enough for her?

Would it ever be possible for a future to come for them? Would they have kids together, get married, grow old together somehow? Would he be sharing his future with her?

Was he good enough to love her? Was he good enough for her to love him too?

All of these questions filled his mind, bombarding him with thoughts and feelings that were complicated and dark within him. He didn't even know where to start looking for the answers...

"Inuyasha? I know you're up there!" He sat up suddenly, looking frantically around him for the owner of the melodic voice. He found her down on the ground, looking up at him with a cute grin on her face.

"Yeah?" He answered back, trying to gain control of himself.

"I'm all done with school for the weekend, so after I pack some food for everyone, we can go back. Okay?" She grasped a few shopping bags in her hands, which were most likely filled with Ramen and the Ninja snacks that both he and Shippou liked.

He was sorry that he hadn't been there to carry her stuff for her...

Oh well, couldn't be helped.

He nodded his agreement and she went inside, packing, as promised, while he decided to wait patiently in her room, wreathed in her scent.

He resolutely made up his mind; he'd tell her that she wasn't coming home for at least a week. That way, he wouldn't have to worry about being without her for a little while. Hopefully she wouldn't ask until then, otherwise he would be forced to comply with her wishes, seeing as he just couldn't say no.

She came quietly into her room, smiling as she saw him sitting on her bed. Inuyasha's heart leapt into his throat and he struggled for the words to say. He breathed heavily, as quietly as he could; regaining control of his body in order to speak.

"Hey Kagome?"

"Yeah?" She looked at him curiously, turning her head away form what she was doing in order to hear him better.

"Can you wait to come back here for a week or two?"

"Why?" She asked, tilting her head cutely, which almost made Inuyasha smile.

"No reason, I just don't want you running off when we need you."

'When I need you.' He thought, bringing his eyes down to rest on her pink comforter.

She was silent for a moment before walking to him and sitting on the bed next to him. He looked up at her expectantly, preparing for that begging tone she usually used when she wanted her way.

But instead he got a sweet smile, and a great view of her brown eyes.

"Sure thing Inuyasha."

He looked into her eyes as she sat there next to him, as close as she could be.

He counted himself so damn lucky...

To be able to see her face whenever he damn well pleased, and to be with her almost everywhere she went...

Because she was so dear to him, he wanted to give all of himself to her. After all of the time that he had kept his pride by refusing to beg, refusing to cry, refusing to love; he never felt good enough to live, despite his pride.

And now, by staying with her, by being at her beck and call and even by protecting her with all of his heart and soul; he felt more at peace than he had ever even thought he could be... Wasn't that worth everything? Wasn't that worth dying for?

Wasn't she worth dying for?

_So take care what you ask of me_

_Cause, I can't say no_

(End)

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